"Owwww!" by Chunky A

Song#:  4122

Date:  12/02/1989

Debut:  96

Peak:  77

Weeks:  6

Genre:  Rap, Comedy, Novelty

Pop Bits:  In 1989, comedian/actor Arsenio Hall began his six season run hosting The Arsenio Hall Show. The program was an immediate success upon its January 3, 1989, premiere. It was during that first season of the show that Hall developed an alter ego character based off of popular rap artists like Heavy D. and The Fat Boys. Hall donned a fat suit and became rapper Chunkston Arthur Hall, aka Chunky A. Hall would end up securing a deal with MCA Records and would write/co-produce a Chunky A debut album titled Large and in Charge. This first single would be issued out and while the video got some attention on MTV, the song fizzled low on the Pop chart while reaching #23 R&B. A second single, "Sorry," would only make it to #91 R&B. With those results, the album would only get to #71 Pop/#41 R&B. While Hall's TV show would continue to be successful, the lack of interest in Chunky A led him to retire the character.

ReduxReview:  I wasn't a fan of Hall or his TV show, so it was not surprising that I had no idea about Chunky A. Frankly, I would have been fine to never know about this, alas I had to cover the single for this project. I can understand that when the limelight shines on someone, they need to capitalize on the moment while they can, which for many celebrities is to branch out into music. While some legitimately do well, others should have selected to do something else. Hall definitely should have tried something else. Setting aside the awful concept and fat jokes, which would not play well these day, Hall's material just wasn't funny. Several rap artists already effectively included humorous elements in their work, so if you are a comedian who wants to send up or satirize those artists, you really have to double down and be excessively clever and Hall didn't get there. It was juvenile humor at best that might make a young teenager chuckle. All Hall did with the Chunky A project was demonstrate how to go from comedy to tragedy in a short few minutes. Yes, I know I'm hard on novelty tracks, but c'mon. This is supposed to be funny and it couldn't even elicit a minor chuckle or crack of a smile from me.

ReduxRating:  0/10

Trivia:  Thanks to the success of his TV show, Hall had access to celebrities and he took advantage of that for his Chunky A album. He was able to secure a few vocal cameos from the likes of Paula Abdul, Ice-T, Troop, and others. For "Owwww!," he was able to not only use a sample of Cameo's hit "Word Up," but also have them appear in the song's video. For the song "Ho Is Lazy," Hall got clearance to use samples from the Fine Young Cannibals' "She Drives Me Crazy."

_________________________________________________________________________________

"Didn't I (Blow Your Mind)" by New Kids on the Block

Top 10 Alert!

Song#:  4036

Date:  09/16/1989

Debut:  68

Peak:  8

Weeks:  19

Genre:  Pop

Pop Bits:  NKOTB mania was in full swing by this point in time following three Pop Top 10 hits including a pair of #1s including the platinum-selling "Hangin' Tough." Their album of the same name had already spent two weeks at #1 and had gone 4x platinum. Wanting to really capitalize on the group's popularity, their label, Columbia Records, decided to reach back to the group's debut and release this cover tune in order to re-promote that self-titled album, which had just recently gone gold. The ballad would do well hitting the Pop Top 10 while also making it to #12 AC and #34 R&B. The ploy worked well with the group's debut LP quickly going platinum and then double-platinum in January of '90.

ReduxReview:  This was just an awful idea from the get-go. These kids were just too young and inexperienced to handle a song like this. Not only that, they had nary an ounce of soulfulness between them. They were meant to do bubblegum/teen pop and not cover a mature soul classic. If their lack of ability wasn't enough, then there was the horrible production. It sounded so cheesy and stilted. Making matters even worse was the addition of an insipid spoken word part. Cover tunes can be a great marketing tool if done right (or even halfway okay), but it takes a special kind of talent to take a well-known hit and then just shit on it. I can't really blame the New Kids for this. You know they were guided and told what to do, so this lies squarely on producer Maurice Starr and whoever else was in charge of the group. Thanks to New Kids mania, this travesty went Top 10. Luckily, since then it has been forgotten. And should be. Yup, this one can join the exclusive zero club.

ReduxRating:  0/10

Trivia:  This is a remake of a Philly soul classic originally recorded by The Delfonics. Their version, titled "Didn't I (Blow Your Mind This Time)," would be a #3 R&B/#10 Pop hit in 1970. The song would earn the group a Grammy for Best R&B Vocal Performance, Duo or Group. Written by producer Thom Bell and the group's lead singer William Hart, it would be The Delfonics' second and final song to reach the Pop Top 10 following 1968's #4 "La-La (Means I Love You)" (#2 R&B). While the song would be covered by many artists, thus far New Kids on the Block have been the only other artist to reach the Pop chart with a version.

_________________________________________________________________________________

"I Saw Him Standing There" by Tiffany

Top 10 Alert!

Song#:  3433

Date:  02/27/1988

Debut:  56

Peak:  7

Weeks:  14

Genre:  Pop

Pop Bits:  This teenager's self-titled debut album started off slow, but finally took off after its second single, "I Think We're Alone Now," hit #1. With its third single, "Could've Been," also topping the chart, the album then made it to #1 for a couple of weeks in late January of '88. To keep things rolling, this next single was issued out. While it would not top the Pop chart, it did well by cracking the Top 10. The hit helped the album sell more copies and by April of '88, it would reach its last certification level of 4x platinum.

ReduxReview:  No. Just no. In fact, hell no. Pop music is full of atrocious covers, but this one has to rank among the most heinous. Not only is it just plain awful, but it is a desecration of a classic Beatles song. It is musical sacrilege. Of course Tiffany participated, but I don't know if I can really place the blame on her for this. Chances are good that the young teen didn't even know the song and perhaps knew little about the Beatles. Her career and choices at at the time were masterminded by producer George Tobin and I place the blame for this squarely on him. His idea to cover this song along with the ridiculous arrangement and obnoxious, hyperactive production was the equivalent of musical murder. He should have been arrested, tried, and convicted for this crime against music and the Beatles. I didn't like Tiffany's "I Think We're Alone Now," but I didn't think things could get worse especially after the bright spot of "Could've Been," but I was way wrong. At this point in the blog, only two songs have been so bad that I rated them a zero. I can now up that total to three with this travesty.

ReduxRating:  0/10

Trivia:  This is a cover of a song originally recorded by the Beatles. Written mainly by Paul McCartney along with John Lennon, the tune was first released as the opening track on the band's 1963 UK debut album Please Please Me. In the US, the song would first appear as the b-side to "I Wanna Hold Your Hand," which was released in December of '63 and would be the Beatles' first #1 spending seven weeks at the top of the Pop chart. Due to the major success of that single, "I Saw Him Standing There" picked up airplay as well and it would chart separately getting to #14. Both songs would be included on the band's second US album Meet the Beatles! Many artists would cover the song, but thus far Tiffany's role-reversed version is the only other one to reach the Pop chart.

_________________________________________________________________________________

"(Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay" by Michael Bolton

Song#:  3386

Date:  01/23/1988

Debut:  72

Peak:  11

Weeks:  17

Genre:  Pop, Adult Contemporary, Blue-Eyed Soul

Pop Bits:  Bolton's The Hunger album was his fifth solo attempt to break through to the masses and while it wasn't a major hit at the time, it was a significant step forward. The LP's first single, "That's What Love Is All About," became his first to crack the Pop Top 40 peaking at #19 (#3 AC). Then for a follow-up, this cover tune was issued out. It did even better by nearly making the Pop Top 10, stopping at the dreaded #11 spot, while getting to #12 Rock, #19 AC, and #58 R&B. The two hits helped the album sell well and get to #46. His next album, 1989's Soul Provider, would be a much bigger hit, which then led folks back to The Hunger. Late in '89, both albums would be certified gold sellers. The Hunger would go on to sell over 2 million copies.

ReduxReview:  Ugh, I have been dreading this one. Otis Redding's original was just so perfect. The arrangement, the production, the vocal, the lyrics, and especially the feeling that it exuded. Oh, and the whsitle...c'mon. Whenever I hear it, the tune just transports me. I want to grab a cocktail and make my way to a dock that jets out over a beautiful, peaceful body of water and just marvel at the world and life in general. You can feel exactly what Redding was writing about and the serene, mellow way the song was recorded only enhanced the experience. It was brilliant. Still is. Now, why on this blue/green earth would anyone want to cover this classic? I get that it probably influenced artists and it may have been a favorite, but besides just having fun and covering it in concert, why would someone just absolutely mess this up by recording a version of it? And releasing it as a single? Redding's sons did it (see below), but I can sort give a pass to that one as it was more of a tribute, but anyone else doing it is just not going to sit right with me. Bolton's take is certainly one of the worst. It's like he sucked the life blood out of the tune with an unnecessarily big arrangement and a caterwauling vocal that didn't make me want to sit on the dock of the bay, but jump off of it and swim away! It took everything that made the original so amazing and tossed it in the trash. Every second of it makes me cringe. Others apparently loved it and that's okay. If they can appreciate this song, even from this horrific remake, then at least Redding's art and legacy can live on. As for me, I'd be happy to never, ever hear this desecration of a classic again.

ReduxRating:  0/10

Trivia:  This is a remake of a song originally co-written (with Steve Cropper) and recorded by Otis Redding. Redding cut the track late in 1967. It was finished on December 7th. Three days later, Redding would die in a plane crash. The song was released as a single in January of '68 and it became an instant smash topping both the Pop and R&B charts. It would also go on to win two Grammys. The classic song would be covered by many artists with six versions reaching the Pop chart including ones by Sammy Hagar and The Reddings. Bolton's version has been the most successful of the remakes on the Pop chart and as of this posting date it has been the last one to chart. Bolton's version got a big nod of approval from Redding's widow Zelma. After hearing his version, she wrote Bolton a letter that said it was her all-time favorite cover version of the song.

_________________________________________________________________________________

"Eat My Shorts" by Rick Dees

Song#:  2159
Date:  12/15/1984
Debut:  77
Peak:  75
Weeks:  5
Genre:  Novelty, Comedy



Pop Bits:  Radio personality Rick Dees worked for several stations around the country before landing a gig at a station in Memphis. While there, he wrote and recorded the song "Disco Duck," which went on to become a #1 song in 1976. He later landed at KIIS-FM in Los Angeles where he remained for twenty-three years. Along the way, Dee continued to record comedy/novelty records. His 1983 album Hurt Me Baby - Make Me Write Bad Checks! would get nominated for a Grammy for Best Comedy Album. The following year he issued his next LP titled Put It Where the Sun Don't Shine. A track from the album, "Get Nekked," would be released as a single. It wasn't catching on, but the 45's flip side, "Eat My Shorts," started to get some attention and it was enough to get the song on the Pop chart for a few short weeks. Dees would record a couple more comedy albums and would later host his own late night talk show in 1990 for a season (Into the Night Starring Rick Dees). In 2004, Dees left KIIS due to a contract dispute. He was replaced by American Idol host Ryan Seacrest. Dees still hosts his long-running syndicated program Weekly Top 40.

ReduxReview:  I guess like beauty, humor is in the ears of the beholder. This beholder finds nothing funny with this song. I never understood the attraction to Dees. He's fine as a DJ, but as a comedian, no. For me, "Disco Duck" was one of the biggest turds to ever hit #1. Why folks found it even remotely funny or interesting still boggles my mind. This "song" belongs in the same toilet that held "Disco Duck." Everything about it is awful and not even close to being funny. I could barely stand one listen. It's practically painful to hear. I'm very thankful that this is the one and only time I have to cover a Dee's song in this project. I can't even give it a 1 out of 10.

ReduxRating:  0/10

Trivia:  Double Shot!  1) If you happen to think this was inspired by the famous Bart Simpson catchphrase, it wasn't. The Simpson's didn't make their first appearance on TV until 1987 in short spots during The Tracey Ullman Show. Then The Simpsons animated program premiered in 1989.  2) Also included on Dee's Put It album was a track called "When Sonny Sniffs Glue." A portion of the track contains a parody of the Johnny Mathis version of the standard "When Sunny Gets Blue." Dees sought permission from the song's copyright owner to use it in the parody, but the use was denied. Dees still went ahead and used it and was then sued. The court case ended with Dees winning. The judge determined that since the track was making fun of Mathis' style of singing, it didn't violate copyright laws. An appeal resulted in the same decision.

_________________________________________________________________________________

"Voice of Freedom" by Jim Kirk & the TM Singers

Song#:  0055
Date:  02/16/1980
Debut:  73
Peak:  71
Weeks:  3
Genre:  Easy Listening, Pop



Pop Bits:  Jim Kirk produced and created a lot of music for the American Top 40 and American Country Countdown radio shows. He also wrote and produced a ton of jingles and promos for radio and TV stations and corporations like Coca-Cola. Roy Disney hired him as creative director for TM Productions where a huge amount of his work was produced. During that time this song came about as a benefit for the American Red Cross. Later on, he co-founded Corporate Magic which specialized in producing major corporate events.

ReduxReview:  Okay, this is just such an easy target that I wonder if it is even worth commenting on. Oh, but I will. Right from the start you can tell this was done by a jingle writer. It sounds so radio spot/TV commercial/theme park-y. I want to be nice because this song benefited a worthy cause, but this is just so hideous. I've heard some pretty awful pop in my day but this just sets a new record. I actually made it through this tripe twice without my head exploding into little puffs of red, white and blue cotton candy. I'm gonna have to listen to some Metallica just to get the caked-on, dried up saccharine cracked off of my ears. Oh, the humanity...

ReduxRating:  0/10

Trivia:  At one time, Corporate Magic was acquired by Gaylord Entertainment - the folks who own such places as the Ryman Auditorium and the Grand Ole Opry. Later on, Kirk re-purchased the main stake in the company and now is back to heading up the company he started.


_________________________________________________________________________________